I have been confronted lately with the realization of how I can play games with God. Sharon wrote in our last update how a good apartment came along and we felt that God was telling us to give it to the other couple on the team. Since then I have a new found, though inconsistent, sense of justice that keeps growing everyday. Let me explain, you see when I do something wrong and my sin surfaces, I rely on the fact that we do not have a contractual relationship with God. Namely, that He does not treat us as our sin deserves, but is patient and full of grace. This is a truth that I would die for. However, contradiction has surfaced yet again in my life and I have had thoughts that God should reward us for thinking of the others on our team instead of ourselves. This is also known as a contractual relationship. So when things are in my benefit I find myself wanting a contractual God who treats me as I deserve.
Truly though I praise God that He loves us unconditionally, despite my inconsistencies.
So will we find a sweet apartment? I am not sure. I know that God does not owe us one. He is good however and loves to give good gifts to His children. But sometimes these good gifts are not always the “blessings” we think they should be. Sometimes they come wrapped in frustration or pain and they do not seem good until years later.
We are praying for a good apartment where we can feel at home though.
7 comments:
Love reading your blog...and love to be able to hear your heart! We keep praying for that very special apartment to come along!
WOW this "apartment thing" realy seems to be your "BIG" focus. I am looking forward to hearing what else God is up to in LT. besides just keeping you from your dream apartment.
We're praying for you guys. let us know if there's something specific we can be praying about.
It appears that someone has concerns about our ministry. I would love to address any concerns or issues you have. Please email matt at mormance@gmail.com and please use your name so we can have a genuine dialogue. Thanks.
Hey Matt & Sharon~ I didn't realize you are in LT! We were wondering about you when we walked past your old place on 87th and Pacific yesterday. I'm glad I just came across your blogspot. Have you found the apartment yet? We'll say a prayer for you tonight. Love to hear from you ~
What you may not see is the growth that is occurring in all of your lives and it is definitely there. God is with you and challenging you every day to be his. What a wonderful experience you are able to have. It is easy for us to sit back home "safe & sound" whle you are on the front lines, away from any and all that know you. Just remember that even though you are physically miles away from friends and family, you are only a prayer away from brothers and sisters that love you. Stay strong and pursue Christ at every opportunity. We are with you in spirit and are praying for your ministry.
I'm excited to hear of the home you guys find because you home was a safe place for me to come and be myself when in Portland. I felt welcome and hope that your able to find a place that can seem like home and it can be a place that others can come to and feel loved.
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